{The Talk}

Don't get too excited. This wasn't necessarily a 'BIG' talk or anything, just one that happened. And truth be told - it may have happened before the previous post, but I kind of forgot. It's bound to happen after 17 years.

And once again, this story made no appearance in my journal.

I'll be the first to admit that I was always a little boy crazy. And while I really liked Eric and wanted to pursue a relationship, I also had at least 3 other guys on my mind. (Yes, Eric knew this) Because of this I wanted to know what Eric was thinking, or I guess feeling is the more accurate word.

Now if you know me, you know I've always been a bit shy and saying what's on my mind doesn't come easily. (At least when I'm talking person to person) So for this story to happen, it took guts.

One summer night after hanging out with Russ and Stacy, I told Eric we needed to talk. And of course, everyone thinks about a million different things when someone says that to you.

It was definitely difficult for me to bring up and I'm sure I sounded like a complete idiot. But the gist of it was that I wanted to know where our 'relationship' was going, and where I 'stood' in his eyes.

Being the honest guy that he is, he replied with, "Right now, no one stands anywhere."

SOURCE

Eric was just enjoying his time and wasn't necessarily interested in a relationship. He wasn't in any sort of hurry to rush into a relationship or be serious about any girl. I was the one in a hurry and for whatever reason felt we needed some sort of definition for what we were doing.

I left that conversation feeling like a fool and not sure what to think. In a way I was relieved that Eric didn't want to be serious, but I also felt that if that was the case - I was wasting my time hanging out with him.

I think we both kind of decided to just see where things went and go from there. It killed me, but at least it gave me a reason to not feel guilty going out with the other guys I liked.